Sunday 17 November 2013

6c Inquiry Title

I have decided to title my inquiry : The Fear of Performance.

I felt the title should be short and snappy, so as to grab the reader's attention.
The reason I have chosen this title is because it resonates with me on a personal level.
As a young child I was frightened of standing up in class and presenting my work. This fear of being the centre of attention, would leave me trembling, sweaty, and tongue tied.
As I grew older, this feeling stayed with me. The voice of doubt would always shout down any attempt to succeed.
I  went on to study music. But my performance exams were a nightmare. The nerves would come to the fore. In my panic, my hands would literally stop working.
In my desperation, I searched out a course to help with my affliction. The course was called Confidence through Drama. Once a week I would meet with others, different ages, from every walk of like, but all with one thing in common : the fear of getting up in front of people and performing.
The rest is history (not world shattering history, just my own humble history) Having been bitten by the acting bug, I went on to study at drama school. By now I had grown in confidence, I knew I could act, though I was aware I still had a lot to learn. I still got nervous before a performance, but no where near as bad.
I imagined at this stage, I was the only one to still feel the effects of nerves. However, as I got to know my fellow students, it soon became apparent that nerves were still an issue for many of us.
Why was this? We were in a safe environment at drama school, and yet nerves plagued us. The desire to do well in front of our peers, the pressure of getting good marks, these and many other external pressures influences our emotions. I did well in class and performance blocks, but always felt, if I could lose my fear I would be a better performer.
I began reading articles, and interviews with seasoned professionals who still suffered from nerves. As well as the physical manifestation brought on by nerves tension, they also mentioned a wavering confidence, the voice inside their head that told them they were no good, or as actors often put it "the fear of being found out".
I soon realised that nerves were not a beast that could be killed, but one that could, perhaps, be tamed.
Recently, I was having trouble with the audition process. I contacted an established actor, on Twitter, and he gave me some advice.
On my next audition I followed his suggestions. The results were great.
I had followed a one sentence instruction, and my audition process had improved.
It got me thinking, if I could research the manifestation and coping methods of nerves, in performers, maybe it's results could help others.

Yes, I still get nervous before a performance, but my confidence has come along way, since that first acting course, and I feel with more knowledge behind me I can grow further in confidence, and help others to do so.
I went from a boy shaking nervously in class to a man performing in front of hundreds of people. I'm living proof that it can work.
I hope my research will resonate with all performers, and make them try a new approach, or at the very least, take solace in the knowledge that they are not the only sufferers.
I also hope to take the things I learn in the inquiry, and use them in my future role as a teacher, so that children and adults need not fear performance, but enjoy it for what it is.

 

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