Inquiry submission

I have just submitted my dissertation. I have mixed feelings.
I kept tampering with it until the end, which is not a good thing. It can leave you head spinning and a bit word-blind.
But, I think I always felt that way in the closing days of submitting module work so perhaps it's just committing the work for scrutiny that makes me feel uneasy. Whatever the reason - it's finally done.

Amendments : From Inquiry to Hey Jude

Under advisement I have just made amendments to my Evaluation. Next up : changes to Analysis.
It's interesting that whilst making these amendments I felt the project slipping away from me, even though I know they can only improve the piece. I had grown atrached to the form of the original. This reminded me of script writing. Sometimes you can grow attached to a line or a scene, even though inside you know it disrupts the balance of the piece. But you must look at the bigger picture and know when to make changes. This is what it is to craft something. As Paul McCartney once said "It's not about the notes you added, but the notes you leave out."

Inquiry update

Well, I've finally handed in a copy of my intro, evaluation, analysis and artifact. (Though having now proof read it, I've seen typos and oversights).
How do I feel about this body of work?
To be honest, I'm not sure. Probably apprehensive. I seem to have research material left over. Plus,  every now and then I will come up with something that I think should have been included. But that would mean omitting something else.
Have I done the right thing?
I think at the moment I'm too close to the material. I need to take a breath and then review.

Evaluation and Literature.

Just finished my evaluation and Literature review. It was interesting to look back on the process which, if I'm to be honest, didn't go as smoothly as I would have liked. Interviews had to be cancelled and rearranged and then cancelled again with alarming regularity. But we got there in the end. I have also found that some of my literature sources have been abandoned, whilst other have been moved lower down the ranks of importance/relevance. I suppose it's better to have too many sources than not enough.

Now to look at the ethics.

We are Detective

I have found that by applying an acting strategy to my research I am able to glean more from the literature.
Let me explain.
When given a script we are taught to take a methodical approach.
First read the script for what it is - a story.
Read it again. Picking up on neuonses.
Read again looking at your character. What people say about him/her and what they say about themselves.

There are more steps to this process,  but I think this highlights the approach I am taking to my literature. Even if it's one paragraph, one quote, be a detective.
In quotes sometimes people tell you more about themselves, their approach,  their craft -  if you read between the lines. Of course, once you've done this you must find more evidence to substantiate your claim.
But finding evidence is what a good detective does.

Full steam ahead

So, today's campus tutorial was interesting, and helped clarify some of the concerns of how I go about my Inquiry.
We had an overview of philosophical view points and our own positionality in relation to our investigation within our chosen profession.
What really struck home was the time frame we are working to. Now's the time. I need to start drawing the threads of my inquiry together and produce a coherent and logically plotted piece of investigative writing.

Literature review

Currently, I am working my way through Acting theory and Sports psychology, and finding similarities in their strategies for success (by success, I mean a successful endeavour not monetary gain)
Interestingly, it appears, on the face of it, that musicians and sportsmen work harder in their alone - time than actors. Is this really the case?
I will put this to my SIG (British Actors Network) on Facebook, and observe the feedback.

The first acting strategy

Recently, an actor, friend of mine recounted a performance of his on stage in the West End of London. He described how, for a moment, he became aware of where he was performing, the history, the magnitude of it all. He snapped straight back into the performance. But, now he was thinking " did the audience notice" and "am I repeating the same line." He, of course,  continued on through, regardless of the doubt in his mind. He continued on through because the story had to be told: the show must go on.
The show must go on.
Ever since those words (some credit them to P T Barnum, others, Noel Coward) were uttered, they have become a dictum, a rallying cry to the performer. For, within those words can be found not just a simple instruction, but, a performance strategy. The show must go on : no matter what else occurs, it is your duty, in that moment, to draw strength and inspiration, to find it within yourself to rise above the circumstance, and tell the story.
Here endith the lesson. Here endith the first principal of performance : the first acting strategy.

Strategy for Acting. Strategy for Life.

Most people lead two lives. One personal, the other professional. Performers are no different. In fact I would say they juggle with a slightly more complex dynamic: the personal life, and two professional lives. The career we strive for, and the job we do to support our ambitions.
We are often faced with social and work place politics. Situations that draw on our precious time. It is at these times we need a strategy, a way of keeping us on track.
Recently, I had situations arise at work and where I am currently living. These both took up a considerable amount of my time and focus. The problem was that most of that time was not spent on dealing with said situations but obsessing about them.
In the end I employed a self reflective approach. I established my priorities and began to let go of the things that did not pertain to those priorities.
My current study is a priority. My continuing development as a professional performer is a priority. What "he said, she said" is not.
If I aim to fulfil my ambition, I must focus. A reflective process, a mental priority planner, a perspective lense. These are all parts of my strategy to maintain life as a professional performer.

Rejection Strategy

As I have mentioned before, I have written scripts for independent short films and one for BBC.
Time constraints on film production often means scenes are left out or dialogue changed, resulting in a different story interpretation to the one the writer intended.
I wanted more control over my material, and so wrote my ideas out as stories in prose.
Next step : I sent the stories off to magazines.
That's when it began: The rejection letters.
I took the rejections surprisingly well.
This began to make me think about my Inquiry (which is now concentrating,  not so much on fear, but on the coping strategies).
Did my lack of self- administered mental chastisement mean that I had triggered a coping strategy?
The broad reply would always be "well, I'm use to rejection now", as if over the years a tough outer shell had formed naturally, organically,  without cognitive intervention.
Of course, what had happened was, over those years, I had wrestled my demons with logic, with reason. For every audition I did not get, I chose not to throw myself upon the alter of self pity, but, instead, to look at other reasons why I might not have won the role. Reasons often out of my control ie wrong look, too young, too old, too tall.
If I felt I had done a particularly bad job, yes, I was introspective, but purely as a means to improve my practice. However, I would always try and see the bigger picture. Apply a balanced view. To this day, this is how I cope with rejection. This is my strategy.

Critical Reflection on Professional Practitioner Inquiry

URL : plus.google.com/103709504251965315208


Many of my fellow students were basing theirs on teaching in the education system (something I have no experience of). So, instead I chose a topic that affected me in my professional life, and was also something that would resonated with fellow performers : nerves and anxiety. I had read an interview with an established actor, who upon winning a film role, suddenly felt he had no idea how to play the role. This strange juxtaposition of confidence and doubt was the bases for my original set of questions. I posted these on my blog and the answers I got back were varied and interesting. What soon became apparent was that though my questions were aimed at actors, they also spoke to dancers, visual artists, etc. I dispensed with questions on professionalism as a method of good practice, and the state of "being in the moment". Instead I expanded the questions that addressed fear as a social science within the acting community. This I found more compellingly, as without confidence, professionalism nor the state of being, .could be achieved .
I put my questions up on Facebook, but I received not one reply. Instead I was approached by actors individually - unwilling to answer the questions in a public forum,  but more than happy to answer them in a one on one interview.
I tried my questions out on one actor, with interesting results. What did become apparent was how actors not only viewed punctuality and voice work as good professional practice, but also as a means to controlling nerves.
Upon receiving feedback on my proposal plan, I decided to also include the topic of Fear as a cultural phenomenon in my Inquiry.
Before I looked at Ethics, I had taken it as a given that I would be courteous and trustworthy in my conducted. However, the Reader brought home the fact that these concepts served no purpose ruminating in my mind, but had to be written down as a contract of assurances for all to see. It also made me realise that recording peoples views and feelings meant I would be dealing with material of a sensitive nature, and would need be stored and later disposed of in an orderly and secure fashion.
Once again, I took it as a given that I would be ethical throughout my Inquiry. I imagine people tailor the facts to their own ends because they are aiming at a predetermined conclusion. However, my Inquiry is more organic. It's outcome being as much a mystery to me at this stage as it will be for the reader. Only upon applying my findings can I hope to give a satisfy conclusion.
When I considered the right Tools of Inquiry for my proposal, I had to factor in logistical considerations. The idea of securing a group of actors for a group discussion proved troublesome. Also, Observation was ruled out,  because of the nature of my questions - I'm not recording the external indicators,  but instead asking my subjects to be introspective/reflective.  The fact that actors had been unwilling to answer these questions in a forum, but willing to do so over a coffee,  made me realise one on one interviews were the way to go.
I felt a semi structured approach would help create a more conducive environment, and allow my interview subjects to open up.