5a Ethics

Ethics is a tough one. As I formulate my inquiry I must be mindful of the ethical safe-guards that need to be in place. These safe-guards not only protect my work, but also give the contributors to my inquiry peace of mind. I say this because, if I proceed with my inquiry based on nerves/fear of performance, I am tapping into something quite personal, and to some performers, sacred. Not everyone is willing to disclose the mental chinks in their armour. Performers at best are an odd lot. We will tell ourselves many strange things before we enter an audition or take to the stage, in an attempt to boaster our confidence. Things we don't necessarily want to share. Also there is the superstition element. It is said when using "Emotional Recall" that if someone in the audience knows what memory you are using, that memory loses its power and becomes ineffectual. It is therefore reasonable to assume that some actors will feel the same about revealing their coping mechanisms.
Let's assume I have been given permission by an actor to use material gathered in a question and answer session.
Firstly, I must make sure I stay on topic - only asking the questions relevant to my inquiry.
I must not judge the answers given, instead respected them for what they are. I say this because a fellow actor recently answered my questions, and the first answer out the gate was "I don't get nervous."
I immediately sunk in my chair - we were of to a great start. But the more I listened, the more I learned that this particular actor experienced other things before taking to the stage. Things that differed to my preconceived notion of how these questions and answers would play out.
This brings me to the next ethical point. The answers given must be included in the study, no matter if they seem to steer your inquiry in a different direction. You cant predict the outcome of your investigation. Neither should you try to fit the facts to your inquiry. The eventual evolution of your inquiry - is the inquiry.
Lastly, consent and data protection.
I must reassure my candidates that any material gathered will be used for the purpose of my inquiry within the university, and not for wider publication. This can be achieved with a consent form, a guarantee. I imagine
I would also have to guarantee that, should the candidate want their contribution removed from the study at any point, this would be implemented. This brings me to a grey area at present. If the contributor wants to remain anonymous, does that affect the credibility of my study?
I am toying with the idea of changing my inquiry to Confidence Through Drama. I could still use evidence I have collated, but if I was to proceed with this new inquiry it would now possibly include the experiences of child. This presents another series of ethics. Not only would I need to gain parent permission before asking any questions, but for legal reasons the parents would need to be present.
Whatever the nature of my inquiry, once it is over I need to dispose of the material gathered, responsibly.
If this has been gathered on Dictaphone, the recording must be erased. Likewise any material stored on computer must be wiped from the hard drive. Written material can either be returned to the individual contributors or shredded.

4d Reviewing material

I have started to work through material relating to my topic of Fear/Nerves.
What I have found interesting is that writers who deal with public speaking cover how crippling anxiety can be. Things as a performer I would have never considered ie people choosing not to progress up the corporate ladder, purely because of their fear of public speaking.
I found an anxiety couch online http://www.anxietycoach.com/performanceanxiety.html  who made the interesting distinction between public speaker and performer. He pointed out that both suffer nerves, the difference being the performer has the dilemma that her or she needs to perform. That is the life they have chosen.
He goes on to refer to nerves as "the heckler in your mind." This I think is an accurate analogy. I personally have experienced times when I'm trying to answer back to a destructive voice in my head whilst about to take to the stage.
What was made apparent in this article was that you cannot get rid of anxiety completely. Some people apparently make the mistake of trying to do this. But if you are successful at banishing them in their entirety for one performance, if they resurface in the next performance, the effects on your confidence  will be greater. I can see that as a realistic out come.
Instead one  approach is to work with your nerves. This is probably what I refer to when I say turning  your nerves into a positive force.
David Leisner is a guitarist who also offers way of controlling nerves during performance.http://www.davidleisner.com/guitarcomposer/noname.html Having studied Classical guitar myself, and later giving it up because of nerves- many of the ways nerves manifest in a musician, resonated with me. Speeding up the tempo of a piece, playing wrong notes or not being able to execute correct finger articulation are just a few.

One of his remedies was what he called "Auto Pilot." This is where you relax and let your long term memory take over. This is nothing new. But it did make me question whether this technique only worked for musicians. Does it apply to Dancers as well ? As an actor  being on auto pilot is the last thing I want. I need to be in the moment, reacting to every circumstance as it comes.
I have noticed some overlapping in remedies for performance nerves.
Breathing exercises seem to be a physical universal tool for calming nerves and bringing down the heart rate.
On the mental side, many suggest re conditioning your thinking. Example being: remembering people have come to see a performance, and not necessarily you alone. It's about placing emphasis on the external not the internal. I think this is a sound approach. I know many a time I have made it all about me and my fears, my insecurities, instead of just going out there and performing.
Lastly, I just wanted to mention a medical website I chanced upon. A pianist was asking how to get over performance nerves. The doctor said he suffered from GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) and this could be remedied by taking a beta blocker such as Propranolol.
This raises the issue of chemical intervention. I have always assumed that performance anxiety should be dealt with organically. But it seems one option is to treat it like any other mental disorder and throw pills at it.
I admit, during my classical guitar performance exams I was prescribed and took tablets to relax me. Yes I performed in a relax state but I'm convinced my performance would have been more alive had there been a natural surge of nervous energy running through my system. Slightly off topic, so I'll end it there.

4c Developing questions

As mentioned before, I have re evaluated my questions based on feedback I recieved on my orginal questions.
I have recently sent my questions out to my general group of acting associates.
I have asked in what situations do nerves materialise. Because some of my associates teach, whilst others perform.
I have asked how their nerves manifest. This is an important question as I imagine we experience nerves in different ways (I may be proved wrong).
Also what their coping mechanisms are. This will be interesting as I know some of us have very interesting rituals to keep the demons at bay.
The question about nerves being used as a positive force, I think is relevent, because I know from personal experience nerves can be channelled in a way that can heighten your awareness and drive you through a performance. It will be interesting to see if my colleagues feel the same.
I have put these questions on an open forum inviting people to discuss the topic. I have also said that they can email me direct if privacy is required, and that I will not use any of the answers given without first seeking their approval.

4b SIG

SIGs seem to be a bit thin on the ground dealing with this topic. I have joined a facebook page for Forum theatre.  They specialise in theatre dealing with depression and anxiety.

4a Inquiry update

Well, I'm a bit behind. (Lots of stuff happening. Imminent homelessness being but one) but hopefully I can catch up.
I have restructured my questions.
I originally called my inquiry The Fear of Acting.
But after reading some of the responses I received to my questions by dancers,  I am opening it up to all performers.
Although I have titled it The Fear of...
I am really talking about nerves/confidence. Therefore my questions will now be as follows :
1 When do you experience nerves. At auditions, teaching, or performing?

2 How do your nerves manifest ?

3 What are your coping mechanisms

4 Can your nerves ever be turned into a positive force, if so when and how ?

My plan is to put these questions to three actors in different stages of their careers. One will be an actor just starting out,  another will be predominantly a stage actor, and the last is a tv actor.

Inquiry Outline

Hi everyone
I attended the last campus session which I found very beneficial. Listening to the Module 3 students  helped me formulate ways in - steps I could take to developing my Inquiry. I now had ideas how I could proceed with my investigation, all I needed now was something to investigate.
Towards the end of the last module I touched on something I called the Fear of Acting, and thought I might try an investigate this. I have seen literature written about the mental and physical aspects of performance from the view point of a classical musician.
Fear of Acting is quite a large banner, so let me break it down a bit.

I'm interested in exploring it's negative and positive effects.  Something as a performer we attempt to conquer and  equally embrace.

The first acting class I ever attended was called Confidence Through Drama. The class was made up of people taking their first steps into acting, business people who loathed the idea of speaking at meetings, and others who found it difficult to find their voice in work/social situations. We all came for different reasons. However we  all came to conquer a common enemy: Fear.
Years later I attended Drama School.
The first exercise we did was a trust exercise. An exercise designed to build confidence in you and your awareness of the support around you.
Actors live with fear everyday.
Many actors will confess to the fear "of being found" out. The fear that they will not be able to inhabit a role successfully. The fear of failing an audition. The fear of stepping on stage, speaking the lines.
Of course these are things that are discussed in classes, among actors. There are ways the fear is tackled, on a personal level and with protocols learnt
.Improvisation is one such tool. As well as being a performance tool in its own right, it also means should something happen during a performance, an actor can use improvisation to keep the story moving along until an appropriate point of return to the text is found.
Lastly as an actor, fear is a sensation to be embraced and used in performance.

I'm not sure how I want to progress with this topic or if it is an adequate topic for investigation.

What do you think, guys ?

Frustration

In fear that my writing projects were dominating over my acting projects, I had a meeting with a director/friend, and agreed to perform in a new writing showcase.
I have not been on stage for over a year, and saw this as the ideal opportunity to get back in the game.
We met in a rehearsal studio for a chat.
One of the other showcase pieces was an actor short for the first read- through, and so I was asked to stand in. I agreed.
I could feel my nervous energy kick in. You know,  the kind that works for you,  not against you.
But within a few minutes my nervous energy was replaced by something quite different: frustration.
The actors reading of the material was lacking energy and any kind of creative input. This sounds like a harsh observation, I know. But at drama school, we were taught to invest in a part from the very first reading. Try something. Anything. Doesn't matter if it later becomes apparent that the director wants to take it in another direction. Do something and fail. Fail gloriously. No one cares as long as you "bring something to the table."
The piece in question will improve before it goes in front of an audience,  this I have no doubt.
My frustration lies in my belief that I will only improve as an actor, when I'm the one needing to raise my game, not waiting for others to do so.
If this sounds arrogant, I apologise.
I wish only the best for my fellow actors. I only ask one thing of them: If you desire a professional life in a creative field- then be creative.