I have just submitted my dissertation. I have mixed feelings.
I kept tampering with it until the end, which is not a good thing. It can leave you head spinning and a bit word-blind.
But, I think I always felt that way in the closing days of submitting module work so perhaps it's just committing the work for scrutiny that makes me feel uneasy. Whatever the reason - it's finally done.
Thursday, 8 May 2014
Inquiry submission
Friday, 2 May 2014
Amendments : From Inquiry to Hey Jude
Under advisement I have just made amendments to my Evaluation. Next up : changes to Analysis.
It's interesting that whilst making these amendments I felt the project slipping away from me, even though I know they can only improve the piece. I had grown atrached to the form of the original. This reminded me of script writing. Sometimes you can grow attached to a line or a scene, even though inside you know it disrupts the balance of the piece. But you must look at the bigger picture and know when to make changes. This is what it is to craft something. As Paul McCartney once said "It's not about the notes you added, but the notes you leave out."
Thursday, 24 April 2014
Inquiry update
Well, I've finally handed in a copy of my intro, evaluation, analysis and artifact. (Though having now proof read it, I've seen typos and oversights).
How do I feel about this body of work?
To be honest, I'm not sure. Probably apprehensive. I seem to have research material left over. Plus, every now and then I will come up with something that I think should have been included. But that would mean omitting something else.
Have I done the right thing?
I think at the moment I'm too close to the material. I need to take a breath and then review.
Monday, 7 April 2014
Evaluation and Literature.
Just finished my evaluation and Literature review. It was interesting to look back on the process which, if I'm to be honest, didn't go as smoothly as I would have liked. Interviews had to be cancelled and rearranged and then cancelled again with alarming regularity. But we got there in the end. I have also found that some of my literature sources have been abandoned, whilst other have been moved lower down the ranks of importance/relevance. I suppose it's better to have too many sources than not enough.
Now to look at the ethics.
Thursday, 3 April 2014
We are Detective
I have found that by applying an acting strategy to my research I am able to glean more from the literature.
Let me explain.
When given a script we are taught to take a methodical approach.
First read the script for what it is - a story.
Read it again. Picking up on neuonses.
Read again looking at your character. What people say about him/her and what they say about themselves.
There are more steps to this process, but I think this highlights the approach I am taking to my literature. Even if it's one paragraph, one quote, be a detective.
In quotes sometimes people tell you more about themselves, their approach, their craft - if you read between the lines. Of course, once you've done this you must find more evidence to substantiate your claim.
But finding evidence is what a good detective does.
Thursday, 6 March 2014
Full steam ahead
So, today's campus tutorial was interesting, and helped clarify some of the concerns of how I go about my Inquiry.
We had an overview of philosophical view points and our own positionality in relation to our investigation within our chosen profession.
What really struck home was the time frame we are working to. Now's the time. I need to start drawing the threads of my inquiry together and produce a coherent and logically plotted piece of investigative writing.
Wednesday, 26 February 2014
Literature review
Currently, I am working my way through Acting theory and Sports psychology, and finding similarities in their strategies for success (by success, I mean a successful endeavour not monetary gain)
Interestingly, it appears, on the face of it, that musicians and sportsmen work harder in their alone - time than actors. Is this really the case?
I will put this to my SIG (British Actors Network) on Facebook, and observe the feedback.
Saturday, 15 February 2014
The first acting strategy
Recently, an actor, friend of mine recounted a performance of his on stage in the West End of London. He described how, for a moment, he became aware of where he was performing, the history, the magnitude of it all. He snapped straight back into the performance. But, now he was thinking " did the audience notice" and "am I repeating the same line." He, of course, continued on through, regardless of the doubt in his mind. He continued on through because the story had to be told: the show must go on.
The show must go on.
Ever since those words (some credit them to P T Barnum, others, Noel Coward) were uttered, they have become a dictum, a rallying cry to the performer. For, within those words can be found not just a simple instruction, but, a performance strategy. The show must go on : no matter what else occurs, it is your duty, in that moment, to draw strength and inspiration, to find it within yourself to rise above the circumstance, and tell the story.
Here endith the lesson. Here endith the first principal of performance : the first acting strategy.
Thursday, 13 February 2014
Strategy for Acting. Strategy for Life.
Most people lead two lives. One personal, the other professional. Performers are no different. In fact I would say they juggle with a slightly more complex dynamic: the personal life, and two professional lives. The career we strive for, and the job we do to support our ambitions.
We are often faced with social and work place politics. Situations that draw on our precious time. It is at these times we need a strategy, a way of keeping us on track.
Recently, I had situations arise at work and where I am currently living. These both took up a considerable amount of my time and focus. The problem was that most of that time was not spent on dealing with said situations but obsessing about them.
In the end I employed a self reflective approach. I established my priorities and began to let go of the things that did not pertain to those priorities.
My current study is a priority. My continuing development as a professional performer is a priority. What "he said, she said" is not.
If I aim to fulfil my ambition, I must focus. A reflective process, a mental priority planner, a perspective lense. These are all parts of my strategy to maintain life as a professional performer.
Sunday, 9 February 2014
Rejection Strategy
As I have mentioned before, I have written scripts for independent short films and one for BBC.
Time constraints on film production often means scenes are left out or dialogue changed, resulting in a different story interpretation to the one the writer intended.
I wanted more control over my material, and so wrote my ideas out as stories in prose.
Next step : I sent the stories off to magazines.
That's when it began: The rejection letters.
I took the rejections surprisingly well.
This began to make me think about my Inquiry (which is now concentrating, not so much on fear, but on the coping strategies).
Did my lack of self- administered mental chastisement mean that I had triggered a coping strategy?
The broad reply would always be "well, I'm use to rejection now", as if over the years a tough outer shell had formed naturally, organically, without cognitive intervention.
Of course, what had happened was, over those years, I had wrestled my demons with logic, with reason. For every audition I did not get, I chose not to throw myself upon the alter of self pity, but, instead, to look at other reasons why I might not have won the role. Reasons often out of my control ie wrong look, too young, too old, too tall.
If I felt I had done a particularly bad job, yes, I was introspective, but purely as a means to improve my practice. However, I would always try and see the bigger picture. Apply a balanced view. To this day, this is how I cope with rejection. This is my strategy.
Sunday, 5 January 2014
Critical Reflection on Professional Practitioner Inquiry
URL : plus.google.com/103709504251965315208
Many of my fellow students were basing theirs on teaching in the education system (something I have no experience of). So, instead I chose a topic that affected me in my professional life, and was also something that would resonated with fellow performers : nerves and anxiety. I had read an interview with an established actor, who upon winning a film role, suddenly felt he had no idea how to play the role. This strange juxtaposition of confidence and doubt was the bases for my original set of questions. I posted these on my blog and the answers I got back were varied and interesting. What soon became apparent was that though my questions were aimed at actors, they also spoke to dancers, visual artists, etc. I dispensed with questions on professionalism as a method of good practice, and the state of "being in the moment". Instead I expanded the questions that addressed fear as a social science within the acting community. This I found more compellingly, as without confidence, professionalism nor the state of being, .could be achieved .
I put my questions up on Facebook, but I received not one reply. Instead I was approached by actors individually - unwilling to answer the questions in a public forum, but more than happy to answer them in a one on one interview.
I tried my questions out on one actor, with interesting results. What did become apparent was how actors not only viewed punctuality and voice work as good professional practice, but also as a means to controlling nerves.
Upon receiving feedback on my proposal plan, I decided to also include the topic of Fear as a cultural phenomenon in my Inquiry.
Before I looked at Ethics, I had taken it as a given that I would be courteous and trustworthy in my conducted. However, the Reader brought home the fact that these concepts served no purpose ruminating in my mind, but had to be written down as a contract of assurances for all to see. It also made me realise that recording peoples views and feelings meant I would be dealing with material of a sensitive nature, and would need be stored and later disposed of in an orderly and secure fashion.
Once again, I took it as a given that I would be ethical throughout my Inquiry. I imagine people tailor the facts to their own ends because they are aiming at a predetermined conclusion. However, my Inquiry is more organic. It's outcome being as much a mystery to me at this stage as it will be for the reader. Only upon applying my findings can I hope to give a satisfy conclusion.
When I considered the right Tools of Inquiry for my proposal, I had to factor in logistical considerations. The idea of securing a group of actors for a group discussion proved troublesome. Also, Observation was ruled out, because of the nature of my questions - I'm not recording the external indicators, but instead asking my subjects to be introspective/reflective. The fact that actors had been unwilling to answer these questions in a forum, but willing to do so over a coffee, made me realise one on one interviews were the way to go.
I felt a semi structured approach would help create a more conducive environment, and allow my interview subjects to open up.
Tuesday, 19 November 2013
Further research
Well, calling my Inquiry: Fear of Performance, may not have been the brightest move. If you put that title into a search engine, most answers you get back suggest you take viagra. Plus, genuine literature on the subject is a bit thin on the ground.
I went to Foyles in the west end and their data base showed no books on the subject. Even the person behind the counter said " That's a great topic. Someone should write a book on it."
However, I did find a book aimed at musicians that dealt with nerves/confidence, and quite a few self- help books.
I am now considering both in my literally reviews.
Sunday, 17 November 2013
6c Inquiry Title
I have decided to title my inquiry : The Fear of Performance.
I felt the title should be short and snappy, so as to grab the reader's attention.
The reason I have chosen this title is because it resonates with me on a personal level.
As a young child I was frightened of standing up in class and presenting my work. This fear of being the centre of attention, would leave me trembling, sweaty, and tongue tied.
As I grew older, this feeling stayed with me. The voice of doubt would always shout down any attempt to succeed.
I went on to study music. But my performance exams were a nightmare. The nerves would come to the fore. In my panic, my hands would literally stop working.
In my desperation, I searched out a course to help with my affliction. The course was called Confidence through Drama. Once a week I would meet with others, different ages, from every walk of like, but all with one thing in common : the fear of getting up in front of people and performing.
The rest is history (not world shattering history, just my own humble history) Having been bitten by the acting bug, I went on to study at drama school. By now I had grown in confidence, I knew I could act, though I was aware I still had a lot to learn. I still got nervous before a performance, but no where near as bad.
I imagined at this stage, I was the only one to still feel the effects of nerves. However, as I got to know my fellow students, it soon became apparent that nerves were still an issue for many of us.
Why was this? We were in a safe environment at drama school, and yet nerves plagued us. The desire to do well in front of our peers, the pressure of getting good marks, these and many other external pressures influences our emotions. I did well in class and performance blocks, but always felt, if I could lose my fear I would be a better performer.
I began reading articles, and interviews with seasoned professionals who still suffered from nerves. As well as the physical manifestation brought on by nerves tension, they also mentioned a wavering confidence, the voice inside their head that told them they were no good, or as actors often put it "the fear of being found out".
I soon realised that nerves were not a beast that could be killed, but one that could, perhaps, be tamed.
Recently, I was having trouble with the audition process. I contacted an established actor, on Twitter, and he gave me some advice.
On my next audition I followed his suggestions. The results were great.
I had followed a one sentence instruction, and my audition process had improved.
It got me thinking, if I could research the manifestation and coping methods of nerves, in performers, maybe it's results could help others.
Yes, I still get nervous before a performance, but my confidence has come along way, since that first acting course, and I feel with more knowledge behind me I can grow further in confidence, and help others to do so.
I went from a boy shaking nervously in class to a man performing in front of hundreds of people. I'm living proof that it can work.
I hope my research will resonate with all performers, and make them try a new approach, or at the very least, take solace in the knowledge that they are not the only sufferers.
I also hope to take the things I learn in the inquiry, and use them in my future role as a teacher, so that children and adults need not fear performance, but enjoy it for what it is.
6b Critical Reflection on Research Tools
Informing the candidate of your intentions would be the first step, and gaining permission to use the data. Also, if the data is of a sensitive nature, you must be prepared that the candidate will want the information gathered, removed at anytime. This of course can happen with any data gathered. But when it comes to a educational course that depends on me completing an inquiry, I would rather lessen the risk of having to abort part of the project under such time restraints.
Also, with observational reflection, I feel you also run the risk of misinterpreting some of the indicators. For example, I may assume from someones body language that they are nervous/worried, and put that in my inquiry, only to find out that was not the case.
For the purpose of my inquiry, I will observe. However, I am interested in the verbal responses, and should I notice any physical indicators, they can influence my line of questioning, but will not be critiqued in my inquiry. I am aware that I will be asking Actors to talk about personal issues. These may elicit different reactions. I'm not convinced that recording how happy/upset someone was when I posed a question, will help other actors to learn from, and identify with, the verbal answers.
Observation would be an effective tool if I was in a production with my candidates. I could then observe their reactions within the performance environment. But this could be a problem. When Actors are about to shoot a scene or take to the stage, the last thing they want is someone asking them "how they feel." I think I will get more out of the candidates when they can review the experience in retrospect.
As the Reader stated, the majority of Inquirers will be regular participants in the practice researched.
I will understand many of the contexts referred to by my 'sample', having worked in the same environments. And not only will I be member of the same community, but many of my interviewed candidates will be close friends.
I think the fact that I am an active member of the same profession will hold me in good stead, as I will understand the current events and feelings within our community.
The fact that I have a personal relationship with my candidates will mean there is an instant bond/rapport between us. However, this may seem like a plus on the surface, but could prove to be a negative. I will be asking personal questions of my work colleagues, and they may find it hard to open up. It's not always easy to talk about a shared experience with someone who was there and admit you were nervous, scared, frightened.
I think my research will mean I am an inside researcher to a point, as I will be giving my own account of my experiences. I will also review the interviews and comment on them.
I feel a semi structured approach will be more beneficial. If I am able to refer to some of my own fears and doubts during the interview, it may make the candidate more willing to reveal theirs. Of course this insider approach means I must be weary at all times that my dialogue with the candidate is not tainting the information. It means playing the role of interviewer and participant. This requires a firm grasp of objectivity.
I will pick three candidates based on their knowledge and experience within the field. This does not necessarily mean I am going to pick the candidate with the most extensive knowledge, or the longest serving within the profession.
My inquiry will encompass actors at different stages in their careers, and, where possible, different acting disciplines, such as theatre and film.
The interviews will take place, face to face, in a relaxed environment of the candidate's choosing. All ethical reassures will be expressed, so as to put the interviewee at ease.
The interview will then proceed in a semi-structured form. Introductory questions will be closed, merely requiring a yes or no response. Secondary questions will be open. This will allow the candidate the freedom to answer the topic in greater detail. Open questions will also afford me the opportunity to ask linking question, that can further the study.
Gathering members of the same community in one room, and discussing the inquiry topic, would be beneficial. The group would act as its own support system. This means that the individual candidates may feel more comfortable in numbers, and the more comfortable they are, the more chance they will open up, and express feelings and opinions they would be reluctant to broach in a one on one interview. The group discussion would take on a more organic approach, it would evolve as it went along. However, I would have to choose my candidates wisely, as many of my colleagues are very confident, opinionated individuals. This is great for firing up a Q&A session. However, they can also prove detrimental to the process, as their strong personalities may guide the session away from its intended course. Unfortunately, the logistics of getting a group of actors together in one room (apart from a theatre group) would prove difficult.
Analysing Data
To aid in my inquiry I will seek out data from books and articles. This data will have to be treated carefully. I will need to determine whether the data has merit - if it is relevant to my inquiry, and if the information provided is from a legitimate source.
I will use the knowledge gleaned from this data to bolster my inquiry, by means of cross referencing. I will be looking for patterns or trends within the material, and see if my candidates express the same views. I want the data to run side by side with my inquiry, not to dominate it. Therefore, selection of complementary material is a must. However, if I find data that goes against the grain, I will need to carefully consider how best to introduce in into the research.
Saturday, 16 November 2013
6a Inquiry
On Thursday 13th Nov 2013, I conducted an informal interview. This was a one on one interview - a exploratory conversion using my structured questions as a springboard. I found this approach to be more useful to me than a quantitative approach using a questionnaire. True, I had structured questions and some of them were closed questions, but they were merely used as an introduction to open questions. I also found the semi-structured approach meant that if the "sample " candidate mentioned something interesting that related to my Inquiry - but had not been accounted for in my questions - I could follow this new line of questioning. As I am dealing with emotional responses in my inquiry, the qualitative approach to data collection seems more appropriate at this stage. It was also interesting to observe body language during the interview. However, I'm slightly weary of including in in my reports, as I feel I may not be qualified to interpret it correctly.
Interestingly, during the interview my position / role changed. Instead of just being the interviewer, I found myself becoming a participant, as we both discussed the issues raised, and both tried to find answers through mutual opinion and hypothesis. Although, I was mindful of Reflexivity, and always suggested things in the guise of another open question. Yes, I dictated the topic of conversation ( so that the interview never lost its objective) but never its content.
The results were nothing like I expected. However, they did add an interesting view point to my subject for inquiry. I therefore feel, a qualitative semi structured interview (preferably face to face) is the ideal method of data collection from the sample candidates in my inquiry.
5d
I have also primed some of my close friends, with the intentions of my inquiry and some one the lines of questioning.
Tuesday, 12 November 2013
5b Ethics
As I do not teach at present, my codes of conduct cannot be found within the education system.
As a self employed actor my first contact is with my union Equity.
Equity chairs meetings regularly to discuss, the working conditions of it's members, rates of pay, safety, and the government handling of the arts. Tax and National Insurance are also hot tops of discussion. Each subject addressed comes with its own rules and regulations.
Equity has a vast list of ethical codes of conduct for performers in Theatre, TV, Film, to variety acts in nightclubs, and cruise ship entertainers. These codes of conduct can vary from situation to situation. Nevertheless, the general rules of conduct pertaining to, and expected of a professional performer are universal. These include such things as: punctuality, rehearsal etiquette, and the dreaded mobile phone in a performance space.
The Actors Equity Association (not to be confused with our Equity) lays out these general rules of conduct, nicely http://www.actorsequity.org/docs/outreach/etiquette.pdf
An interesting addition here is the Home Office UK Border code of conduct for foreign performers working in the UK http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/sitecontent/documents/employersandsponsors/pointsbasedsystem/code_of_practice_for_perfor1.pdf
5c Ethics Reader
The Reader introduction said "Ethics is a fascinating area of study." That seems to be the case, as I found this Reader to be one of the most interesting so far.
Ethics comes from the Greek word ethos, to mean"character".
In Robert McKee's (1999) guide to writing, entitled Story, he makes a distinction between characterization and character for the purpose of creative writing. Characterization is the physical appearance, traits, mannerisms, drive. Whereas character is only shown through the choices a person makes in a moment of crisis (this is often in the form of a moral/ethical conflict within the character). Great stories are built on this. We as a people, seem to be fascinated with the ethical choice, be it in literature or film.
Imagine it : Our main character is a thief. Whilst robbing a jewelry store at night, he sees a fire in the adjacent building. A woman cries that her child is still in the building.
Our thief must make an "ethical choice" - get away clean (professional ethic) or save the child and risk the possibility of being caught (personal ethic).
So he saves the child. The child is returned to the waiting arms of the mother, and the thief finds himself in the waiting arms of "New York's finest ".
However, upon hearing of the thief's heroism, the arresting officer is faced with an "ethical choice" - continue with the arrest (the professional ethic) or let the man go ( the personal ethic).
Personal and Organisational Ethics.
Personal ethic seems to be built on the influence of family and peers, re-enforced by the law: a codified series of Do's & Don'ts endorsed by the masses for the good of the masses.
Originally, I was going to write that the law is there to boaster our own ethical code - the law being a backline of defence : if unsure consult the law. However sometimes the law seems to be at odds with the personal ethic. Up until recently, the age of marriage/consent in Vatican City was Twelve.
This was law, but to western ethical standards this was wholly abhorrent. Pope Francis announced an age raise to Eighteen, in light of child abuse cases in the Catholic church. Was pressure from the outside world also a contributing factor in the change? It would not be the first time that someone has re-evaluated their moral position due to the general/ social ethic of the masses.
Case study 2 is a case in point. The photographer Kevin Carter tragically took his own life.
Did his conscience get the better of him, only after winning a Pulitzer Prize for his photo? In effect prospering from someone else's death - a death that he could have averted. Or did he take his life when the public, ( mass ethical pressure) discovered the story surrounding the photo.
Another case is that of Dr Gil Lederman. Dr Lederman was sued by George Harrison's family. They claimed that whilst the terminally ill George Harrison lay dying, Lederman forced him to sign autographs. When the case came to the publics attention, there was an outcry. Lederman had crossed a professional ethical line for his own gain. The Doctor, faced with ethical pressure from the public, later announced that he would sell the autographs for charity.
Professional Ethic
I have given a couple of examples of how personal ethical positions can shift, due to the mass ethical position. However, the Clapham omnibus shows that societies ethical view and the law, is in constant state of flux. It changes in sympathy with the changing world.
Professional Ethics can also change to reflect the current climate.
In 1954 the American Comic book industry was in trouble. The government was accusing it of lowering the moral standards of young readers. In some cities, organised comic book burning took place. Faced with imposed Government regulations, the Comic book industry chose to form a self-regulating body. And so, from that moment on, all comic books carried a stamp on the cover stating " Approved by the Comic Code." This code meant the comic would follow strict guide lines. It was prohibited to show policemen, judges, and government officials in a bad light. Within the story, good would always have to prevail over evil. Law enforcement officers could never be seen to die at the hands of the criminals. Plus, the portrayal of sex, violence and demonic creatures were forbidden.
Through the prevailing years, tastes, and opinions changed, to the point where some of the ethical/ artistic issues of conduct were no longer an issue. The code was still placed on the cover, because many major advertisers felt re-assured by it, and would therefore place their ad's within those comics. By 2000 many comic companies had abandoned the code, and yet were still able to secure advertising revenue. The two biggest comic companies; Marvel and DC eventually dropped the code ( Marvel in 2001. DC in 2011.) in favour of their own age rating system.
By 2011, the last of the comic companies to retain the code, announced it would be removing the stamp from it's covers.
The Ethical code was gone. Replaced by a new set of guidelines to fall in line with the changing world. A world exposed to, and tolerant of, a more explicit depiction of sex and violence, and crime and establishment corruption.
Personal Ethic vs Professional Ethic
Returning to the case of photographer Kevin Carter. The idea that the professional ethic of a photographer is to observe and not interfere, is interesting. Does this mean that being a licensed voyeur makes you unaccountable where life and death is concerned. We could therefore say anyone without moral conscience need only to strap a camera around their neck to be exonerated. I think the moral issue is not that he failed to save the girl's life, but that he failed to do anything.
If you are on stage and a woman in the front row is choking to death - do you continue performing, because your professional ethic dictates "The show must go on." ?
My Professional Ethic
Once I finished the Reader, I went back over my original plan for a ethically sound Inquiry. I think my instincts were correct on Data Protection and Human Rights. However if my Inquiry encompasses the views of children, I would have to be mindful of health and safety - something I had failed to take into account on my original plan. Also, I took it as a given that I would be courteous when documenting individuals in my report; however, after reading Case Study 5, I realised this was something else I would have to give assurances on, within my plan. Lastly for the integrity of the inquiry, plagiarism is also a ethical responsibility. One, that I had previously taken as a given.
Monday, 11 November 2013
5a Ethics
Ethics is a tough one. As I formulate my inquiry I must be mindful of the ethical safe-guards that need to be in place. These safe-guards not only protect my work, but also give the contributors to my inquiry peace of mind. I say this because, if I proceed with my inquiry based on nerves/fear of performance, I am tapping into something quite personal, and to some performers, sacred. Not everyone is willing to disclose the mental chinks in their armour. Performers at best are an odd lot. We will tell ourselves many strange things before we enter an audition or take to the stage, in an attempt to boaster our confidence. Things we don't necessarily want to share. Also there is the superstition element. It is said when using "Emotional Recall" that if someone in the audience knows what memory you are using, that memory loses its power and becomes ineffectual. It is therefore reasonable to assume that some actors will feel the same about revealing their coping mechanisms.
Let's assume I have been given permission by an actor to use material gathered in a question and answer session.
Firstly, I must make sure I stay on topic - only asking the questions relevant to my inquiry.
I must not judge the answers given, instead respected them for what they are. I say this because a fellow actor recently answered my questions, and the first answer out the gate was "I don't get nervous."
I immediately sunk in my chair - we were of to a great start. But the more I listened, the more I learned that this particular actor experienced other things before taking to the stage. Things that differed to my preconceived notion of how these questions and answers would play out.
This brings me to the next ethical point. The answers given must be included in the study, no matter if they seem to steer your inquiry in a different direction. You cant predict the outcome of your investigation. Neither should you try to fit the facts to your inquiry. The eventual evolution of your inquiry - is the inquiry.
Lastly, consent and data protection.
I must reassure my candidates that any material gathered will be used for the purpose of my inquiry within the university, and not for wider publication. This can be achieved with a consent form, a guarantee. I imagine
I would also have to guarantee that, should the candidate want their contribution removed from the study at any point, this would be implemented. This brings me to a grey area at present. If the contributor wants to remain anonymous, does that affect the credibility of my study?
I am toying with the idea of changing my inquiry to Confidence Through Drama. I could still use evidence I have collated, but if I was to proceed with this new inquiry it would now possibly include the experiences of child. This presents another series of ethics. Not only would I need to gain parent permission before asking any questions, but for legal reasons the parents would need to be present.
Whatever the nature of my inquiry, once it is over I need to dispose of the material gathered, responsibly.
If this has been gathered on Dictaphone, the recording must be erased. Likewise any material stored on computer must be wiped from the hard drive. Written material can either be returned to the individual contributors or shredded.
Sunday, 10 November 2013
4d Reviewing material
What I have found interesting is that writers who deal with public speaking cover how crippling anxiety can be. Things as a performer I would have never considered ie people choosing not to progress up the corporate ladder, purely because of their fear of public speaking.
I found an anxiety couch online http://www.anxietycoach.com/performanceanxiety.html who made the interesting distinction between public speaker and performer. He pointed out that both suffer nerves, the difference being the performer has the dilemma that her or she needs to perform. That is the life they have chosen.
He goes on to refer to nerves as "the heckler in your mind." This I think is an accurate analogy. I personally have experienced times when I'm trying to answer back to a destructive voice in my head whilst about to take to the stage.
What was made apparent in this article was that you cannot get rid of anxiety completely. Some people apparently make the mistake of trying to do this. But if you are successful at banishing them in their entirety for one performance, if they resurface in the next performance, the effects on your confidence will be greater. I can see that as a realistic out come.
Instead one approach is to work with your nerves. This is probably what I refer to when I say turning your nerves into a positive force.
David Leisner is a guitarist who also offers way of controlling nerves during performance.http://www.davidleisner.com/guitarcomposer/noname.html Having studied Classical guitar myself, and later giving it up because of nerves- many of the ways nerves manifest in a musician, resonated with me. Speeding up the tempo of a piece, playing wrong notes or not being able to execute correct finger articulation are just a few.
I have noticed some overlapping in remedies for performance nerves.
Breathing exercises seem to be a physical universal tool for calming nerves and bringing down the heart rate.
On the mental side, many suggest re conditioning your thinking. Example being: remembering people have come to see a performance, and not necessarily you alone. It's about placing emphasis on the external not the internal. I think this is a sound approach. I know many a time I have made it all about me and my fears, my insecurities, instead of just going out there and performing.
Lastly, I just wanted to mention a medical website I chanced upon. A pianist was asking how to get over performance nerves. The doctor said he suffered from GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) and this could be remedied by taking a beta blocker such as Propranolol.
This raises the issue of chemical intervention. I have always assumed that performance anxiety should be dealt with organically. But it seems one option is to treat it like any other mental disorder and throw pills at it.
I admit, during my classical guitar performance exams I was prescribed and took tablets to relax me. Yes I performed in a relax state but I'm convinced my performance would have been more alive had there been a natural surge of nervous energy running through my system. Slightly off topic, so I'll end it there.